30 DECEMBER 14-20, 2023 westword.com WESTWORD | REAL ESTATE | RENTALS | HEALTH WELLNESS | SERVICES | EMPLOYMENT | ADULT | MUSIC | CLASSIFIED | FIND MORE MARIJUANA COVERAGE AT WESTWORD.COM/MARIJUANA Candy Paint BY HERBERT FUEGO After months of heading toward cannabis highs on either end of the spectrum, I was fi nally ready for a hybrid — the type of strain that’ll glaze my eyes over, turn a frown upside down and loosen the joints, yet leave me with enough energy to shuffl e around the house or put pants on if required. Darker, colder nights had me in the mood for a Flo-like high, but I also wanted to smoke new buds. That meant a drive across town for fresher choices. Sometimes you need to work to chill. Candy Chrome, sitting bright and shiny on the dispensary shelf, called out to me im- mediately. The modern mix of Runtz and the Menthol (I’ve seen a few reports of Zkittles and Gelato #33 as parents, too) had a resin coat thicker than a mink. This had clear one-hitter potential, and the budtender claimed it car- ried an even-keeled high. With plans to stay inside from Friday evening to Saturday after- noon as the snow fell, I didn’t bother scanning the rest of the store. My snow-globe abode was going to become candy land instead. My teeth came away relatively unscathed from Candy Chrome, but my brain rotted quickly. Cutting through the fog to remem- ber simple words and names became virtu- ally impossible, and processing anything more than microwave directions was a non- starter. My IQ was plummeting by the second — which I try to avoid as a regular user — but at least all stress and anxiety went with it, too. I never had to worry about feeling bored, annoyed or listless after smoking Candy Chrome, which is exactly what I wanted. But ignorance can only be bliss for so long, so keep this mind melter stashed away in case of emergencies. The potency will turn you into a zombie at the fl ick of a match. Looks: Candy Chrome buds look fl uffy and gnarled, with frosty, sticky sugar leaves that are hard to separate from the calyxes. But underneath all of that is a more compact nug than expected, with small but vivid trichomes and the occasional dark-purple spot. She’s a looker, no doubt. Smell: Gaseous blasts with a dry layer of skunk smack me across the face quickly, but Candy Chrome showcases sweeter, fruitier qualities after my nostrils adjust. I notice sugary corn syrup notes and nectarines at the end, too, but overall it’s a lot of sweet diesel. Flavor: Candy Chrome’s sweetness is more noticeable in the smoke, surprisingly, with sugary jabs of stone fruit up front and lemongrass clinging to the sides of my tongue. Diesel and earthy notes hang around long after the session ends, though. Effects: Be prepared to go on autopilot after smoking this. My arms and legs move just fi ne, and Candy Chrome leaves enough energy to go about the day. If my head had anything more than dust and tumbleweeds inside after smoking it, I’d consider this per- fect for the outdoors. Despite my becoming dumb as a rock, however, all stress and anxiety was gone for a few hours. Keep it in the stash for one of those days when nothing goes right. Where to fi nd it: We’ve come across Candy Chrome at Alternative Medicine on Capitol Hill, Best High Dispensary, Boulder Well- ness Center, Chronic Therapy, Colorado Harvest Company, Eclipse Cannabis Co., Good Chemistry, Greenfi elds, the Herbal Center, High West Cannabis, Horizon Can- nabis, Lakeshore Cannabis, Lightshade, Lit, Mana Supply Co., Reefer Madness, Rocky Mountain High, Simply Pure, Spark Dispen- sary and Standing Akimbo so far, but more dispensaries likely carry it. 710 Labs and Artsy grow the majority of Candy Chrome fl ower in Colorado right now, with 710 Labs making popular rosin versions of the strain, as well. Billo, a grower and ex- tractor based in Steamboat Springs, has also made well-received extractions of Candy Chrome, but they’re not as easy to fi nd. Is there a strain you’d like to see profi led? Email [email protected]. Teeth come away relatively unscathed from Candy Chrome, but the brain rots quickly. MARIJUANA S T R A I N G A N G HERBERT FUEGO
