FIND MORE MARIJUANA COVERAGE AT WESTWORD.COM/MARIJUANA MARIJUANA S T RAIN GANG Good luck walking away from Sherb Crasher without losing steam. Crash Landing BY HERBERT FUEGO Smoking a deep bowl after a long day is a desirable self-treatment, but every once in a while the high makes me regret what I wished for. Occasionally, the weed is too good at its job. You know the scenario: The bong on the coffee table is packed, and the munchies and entertainment are already in motion. The only thing left to bring it all together is a nice, fat rip. Five minutes after you’re done coughing, everything seems to be going well. But then your peripherals start tightening up, and the eyes get heavy. Sitting up feels tiresome, and walking to grab more food or turn off the bathroom light is simply too strenuous. The soft, euphoric descent into the relaxation you planned for has turned into a plummet into sleep. In other words, you crashed. It’s not like I wasn’t expecting a stiff punch to the gonads when I bought Sherb Crasher, a child of Sunset Sherbet and Wedding Cake. A clear example of the new school, the buds are dense, frosty and not there to fuck around — but so is every strain that Wedding Cake bears, and it’s not like Sunset Sherbet was a pushover, either. I bought Sherb Crasher so that I could melt away a random bad Tuesday in front of the TV and fall asleep early. Only instead of an early bedtime, I was given the red-light treatment in Men in Black. Every time I smoke Sherb Crasher, I forget 38 how to be a human being and am content with being a rock instead. Not Dwayne Johnson, but a sedentary object with no thoughts or feelings. Thinking is too exhausting, and the trip to the kitchen may as well be fi ve miles. All signs point to Sherb Crasher being highly effective for physical highs and the medical needs that come with them, but this one puts me in the ground too deep, too soon. Looks: Straight out of a sci-fi movie, Sherb Crasher’s buds are bright green with inter- mittent purple spots, dense and fuzzy to the point of prickliness. A classic tropical tree warning if I’ve ever seen one, and a clear indicator that your stoned plans may not go according to plan. Smell: Sherb Crasher smells surprisingly minty given its genetics, with noticeable hints of lemon, roses and a fruit cocktail medley that goes anywhere from berries to peaches. Flavor: A mixture of citrus, menthol and (sometimes) berries, Sherb Crasher reminds me of a skunky, fruity tea with a heavy lemon wedge. It starts out sour, ends earthy and fl oral, and remains dry throughout. Effects: Some users report a blip of energy after smoking Sherb Crasher, but the mental disorientation is too strong for any real action to be taken. I go straight to comatose, and can do little more than change positions on the couch. Even if you don’t feel the physi- cal relaxation immediately, it’s best to keep Sherb Crasher for when minimal thoughts and movement are required. Where to fi nd it: 1136 Yuma, Altitude the Dispensary, Colorado Harvest Company, Elements, Emerald Fields, Helping Hands Herbals, the Herbal Cure, Higher Grade, Kaya Cannabis, Lightshade, Magnolia Road Cannabis Co., Nature’s Kiss, Oasis Cannabis Superstores, Pig ’n’ Whistle, Rocky Road, Solace Meds, the Stone and Twin Peaks Dispensary have been spotted with Sherb Crasher, but there’s a good chance you can fi nd it elsewhere. Veritas Fine Cannabis is responsible for most, if not all, of the wholesale Sherb Crasher in Denver, while Higher Grade grows an in- house version with the same genetics. The two cuts are very similar and represent the strain well, but Higher Grade’s unbranded version is the better deal. Harmony Extracts, Kush Masters and Olio extract Sherb Crasher, too, with several live options available. Suggest a strain at [email protected]. NOVEMBER 3-9, 2022 WESTWORD | REAL ESTATE | RENTALS | HEALTH WELLNESS | SERVICES | EMPLOYMENT | ADULT | MUSIC | CLASSIFIED | westword.com HERBERT FUEGO