Entertainment Arts & BES T MIAMI MEME Starter Packs of Miami @STARTERPACKSMIA (INSTAGRAM) First they came for the Kendall boss babes, and we did not speak out. Then they came for the clout demons, and we did not speak out. Then they came for Miami New Times and — oh, shit. Eventually, Starter Packs of Miami comes for us all. The big-time Miami-Dade meme accounts could never, but Starter Packs goes there, with niche references to Liger’s cookies, Andrew merch drops, and the literature available for purchase at Paradis Books & Bread. Flanigan’s-loving Salt Life bros and Éliou-wearing microinfluencers get equal play. If astrology is your personality, natural wine is your hobby, or Carbone reser- vations are your currency, beware. BES T TE CH BRO T WEET Lucy Guo @LUCY_GUO (TWITTER) After hosting a rager at her $6.7 million Mi- ami condo during Miami Hack Week — complete with lemurs, tech bros, and one massive snake — tech developer-turned-in- vestor Lucy Guo tweeted a scathing letter she received from her homeowners’ associa- tion that detailed how the party spiraled out of control and violated a handful of rules. “My HOA did not appreciate my Miami Hack Week party and the wild animals,” she wrote in the since-deleted tweet, which in- cluded the note from One Thousand Mu- seum Inc., the private corporation that enforces the bylaws at the striking 62-story luxury high-rise where Guo resides. After laying out Guo’s various alleged offenses, the pissed-off association concluded, “All while your Instagram account provides evidence of the events of the night and your brazen at- titude toward the Association’s policies are reflected in the caption of your Instagram Story “MY HOA HATES ME.” BES T COMMENTAR Y ON THE REAL ES TATE MARKET Menephta Fernandez @MENEPHTAF (TIKTOK) $800,000 for that shithole? That’s pretty much the entire premise of Menephta Fer- nandez’s darkly hilarious TikTok videos. The self-appointed chisme real estate critic provides ruthless takedowns of the most in- defensible listings on Miami Zillow. $625,000 for a log cabin in Biscayne Park that “might be” made of Dade County pine? Sure. $1.9 milli for a geodesic dome with a pink bathtub in North Miami Beach? OK. $895,000 for a Pinecrest home with shag carpet and an avocado-colored dishwasher? That’s the market, baby! South Florida real estate agents are already freaking out about Fernandez’s videos — at least one has ob- jected to her use of “private” photos. “The MLS is not the Illumi-fucking-nati!” Fer- nandez clapped back. Then she let out her signature cackle — and kept recording. BES T LOCAL TIK TOKER Ken Russell @KENFORFLORIDA (TIKTOK) Miami City Commissioner Ken Russell may have lost some fans in Miami following a swing vote that cinched approval of the con- tentious Inter Miami FC stadium project, but he has no shortage of TikTok followers. The former international yo-yo champ-turned- politico, who recently pivoted from the U.S. Senate primary race to a run for Congress, shares daily clips on his account @kenfor- florida that cover everything from cannabis policy to how to solve a Rubik’s cube with one hand. Despite occasionally giving off “How do you do, fellow kids” meme energy in his videos, which usually are taken in selfie mode and follow popular TikTok trends, Russell ac- tually seems to be engaging community members on topical issues like medical mari- juana, police reform, and the rent being too damn high. As of late May, he’d amassed more than 250,000 followers. BES T INS TAGRAM Miami Color Theory @MIAMICOLORTHEORY (INSTAGRAM) With its postcard-perfect images of the Brickell skyline and art deco buildings, Mi- ami has long been ready for its close-up. But no one has shot the city more intimately than artist, photographer, and graphic designer Laura Paresky Gould, who runs the popular Miami Color Theory Instagram account, launched in January 2021. Using just her iPhone and a drone, Paresky Gould captures the colorful shapes and shadows of the city’s unique architecture and composes them as if “One of South Florida’s finest musici ’ i i “ i al organizations” —South Florida Classic iial Reviei w 10 10 Season subscriptions on sale now! Single tickets on sale September 6th. SERAPHICFIRE.ORG I 305-285-9060 I @seraphic_fire JUNE 23-29, 2022 JUNE 23-29, 2022 NEW TIMES NEW TIMES BEST OF MIAMI® 2022 BEST OF MIAMI® 2022 miaminewtimes.com | browardpalmbeach.com miaminewtimes.com | browardpalmbeach.com CS A PRINT S TOCK / GETT Y IMAGES
