▼ Culture Tip of the Hat Texas artist Carolyn Patten is raising funds for pro-choice groups with her irreverent merch. BY KENDALL MORGAN L ast month was a hit to the ovaries with the Supreme Court’s decision to overturn Roe v. Wade. In addi- tion to protesting and voting, fund- raising is crucial for those who favor preserving women’s reproductive rights. Artist Carolyn Patten saw a way to con- tribute a year ago with her line of quirky baseball hats. After quitting her job as a CPA in Houston, she was on an extended trip across the United States when inspiration struck. While walking a friend’s greyhound pup in Bend, Oregon, Patten had a brief ex- change with a new dad pushing a stroller and noticed his faded T-shirt had some slo- gan referring to Satan and orgies. “A lot of people in Bend are liberal but emotionally more conservative. They’re not having orgy sex parties, at least that I know of,” Patten says with a laugh. “I had this idea [to make hats] unrelated to abortion; I just thought it was funny.” Emblazoned with “Follow Me to the Sa- tanic Orgy,” her classic dad-cap concept was initially just a way to make extra cash. But, as the orders from friends started pouring in, a bigger idea came into play. “I got the shipment of the first nine hats at the end of August, and it was Sept. 1 that Texas made the ruling, including the abortion ban [after six weeks], so the timing was syn- chronistic,” she says. “I had such a strong re- action; I put two and two together. On top of that, I read an article that lifted me up about the Satanic Temple, which was taking advan- tage of no separation of church and state [in their protests]. I thought, if Christians can do this bullshit, we can do this bullshit, too.” Because the issue was bubbling up in her home state, Patten felt it was important to have 100% of the net proceeds ($15 per hat) go toward raising money — first for Avow, and now for the National Network of Abor- tion Funds. Offering styles in two fonts — Law & Or- 10 der SVU and a classic “Dark Lord” Gothic typeface — the collection of unisex caps is now available in special colors named Buk- kake Black, Butt Plug Black, Fornication Fuchsia and Penetration Purple. Patten is adding tees and a trucker-style hat with her newest design featuring a sugar pink logo straight from the toy aisle announcing “Abortion is healthcare.” Having spent zero dollars on marketing, the artist has nonetheless sold over 300 caps to date. Now based in Santa Cruz, California, her side hustle has turned into her main gig as she fights for reproductive freedom via a site and funny Insta feed @followmetothe- satanicorgy. “This is a lot of work for me, sourcing the hats and figuring it all out. I just threw my website together, and I have Instagram, but I haven’t paid for any ads,” she says. “Any cost I put into this hat is taking away from what I donate. But so far, it’s working. I’m going to Los Angeles on Tuesday as a recent Playboy centerfold wants to do a photo shoot for me. She’s got one million followers, and she’s do- ing it for free!” As Patten gets the word out, her main goal is to help keep both spirits and fund- raising dollars high across the nation. “This hat was a creation out of despair and feeling so powerless,” she says. “There’s so much doom and gloom and scary news out there, but I don’t want there to be sales because of what the government is doing; I want there to be sales because you care about the community or just like orgies. I want to show that there are good people out there that do care, and we can laugh to- gether and not just focus on this scary time.” ▼ MOVIES USEFUL IDIOTS B BEAVIS AND BUTT-HEAD ARE BACK AND GETTING INTO SOME TEXAS- SIZED CRAP IN THEIR HOME STATE. BY LIAM GAUGHAN eloved idiots Beavis and Butt-Head are are returning for a new adven- ture. Although they aren’t any smarter, the idiocy of these two sex-ob- sessed teenage boys actually feels kind of en- ligtened in the year 2022. What once qualified as “below average intelligence” now feels like a step up. Like every other property in Hollywood, Beavis and Butt-Head has a new streaming home. The original series and the 1996 film Beavis and Butt-Head Do America are now available on Paramount+. Showrunner and Texas native Mike Judge is bringing back the series later this year for a new season nearly 10 years after the last revival. In the Beavis and Butt-Head go home again. Paramount+ meantime, longtime fans were treated to a new original movie, Beavis and Butt-Head Do The Universe, which debuted exclusively on the streaming network. Beavis and Butt-Head Do The Universe is essentially an extended pilot for the up- coming season. In 1998, the two goofballs accidentally burn down their high school science fair and are placed in a program for “at-risk youths” that is run through the Johnson Space Center. Amidst their adven- ture, Beavis and Butt-Head accidentally get mixed up with a group of gifted students. They surprisingly manage to “score” an ex- tended internship working on a new space program with the director Serena Ryan (Andrea Savage). Of course, the only reason Beavis and Butt-Head sign up for the mission is be- cause they think they’re about to “score” with Serena. They’re accidentally trans- ported through a time portal to 2022, when Serena is the governor of Texas and she wants to cover up the mistakes of her past. Serena sends assassins to kill Beavis and Butt-Head to prevent a scandal from break- ing out. Beavis and Butt-Head are in danger, which of course goes completely over their heads. They spend most of the film trying to find Serena and a portal back to the ’90s, which takes them on a statewide trip to some iconic Texas landmarks. It’s hilarious to see these two engage with modern Texas culture. Judge has always been an ardent so- cial critic (just watch Office Space or Idioc- racy to see how prophetic he can be), but he really digs his claws into everything that’s wrong with our reality using some specific local references. When they are in Galveston, Beavis and Butt-Head devour a signature Tex-Mex dish, steak nachos. In the 1990s, the idea of paying for something using a phone seemed like something out of Star Trek. After acci- dentally stealing an iPhone, Beavis and Butt- Head use the Siri app to fill their cravings for delicious Mexican food with a seemingly unlimited budget at their disposal. The film also lampoons the cynicism of modern Texas political campaigning. They are mistaken by Serena’s campaign team for “at risk” teenagers. Serena’s savvy team thinks they can take advantage of these two in order to appeal to voters. Unfortunately, Beavis and Butt-Head aren’t exactly the wokest spokesmen if you’re trying to appeal to sympathetic voters looking to support the poor and needy. That’s not the only experience that Beavis and Butt-Head have with what’s “woke” in 2022. They accidentally manage to stumble into a women’s seminar course in the middle of the fictional town of Highland. Although the university itself is not named, it’s clearly modeled after more left-wing campuses like Southwestern University, Saint Edward’s University or Rice University. Beavis and Butt-Head immediately create an uproar. In one of the funniest moments in the film, Beavis and Butt-Head don’t recognize the issue when they’re confronted by a hi- lariously “passionate” male feminist, a mansplainer of social justice. If you’ve ever sat next to this type of guy in a college class, you’ll probably appreciate seeing Beavis and Butt-Head interact with an obnoxious dude who thinks he can speak for women. Thank- fully, Beavis and Butt-Head get a little more insight from the women’s studies professor (played by comedian Tig Notaro). After learning about white privilege and toxic masculinity, Beavis and Butt-Head misinterpret the lecture as an excuse to do whatever they want. Maybe they haven’t learned much, but Beavis and Butt-Head are at least aware of their inherent advantages. Judge also throws some subtle commen- tary about the state of the Texas prison sys- tem. Beavis and Butt-Head are arrested and sent to an overstuffed prison without a trial. They’re hardly the only harmless characters who are unjustly sitting in a jail cell. As they goof around (and Beavis brings back his “Cornholio” alter ego), they’re mistaken for activists and start a prison riot. Ironically, it’s the inadvertent power of Beavis and Butt-Head that overwhelms the local corrupt cops. Judge throws in many more local refer- ences that Texans might appreciate. Butt- Head tears up the San Antonio River Walk in a dream sequence; religious extremists mis- take Beavis for an angel; the duo’s home is taken over by a greedy banking system; and both boys make the mistake of trying to use a port-a-potty outside of a construction site. Hopefully, that’s not an experience that you can relate to. Even in the Beavis and Butt- Head universe, Interstate 35 is no closer to being completed. Beavis and Butt-Head Do The Universe retains everything that made the original MTV series so brilliant. Judge never talks down to his audience and draws inspiration from his own experiences. Beavis and Butt- Head are morons, but sometimes it takes morons to save the universe. It’s fun to see them awakened in a darker reality but hav- ing no awareness of how things have changed. There are certainly more modern devel- opments that these two will have left to ex- perience with Beavis and Butt-Head’s next season. They haven’t yet sampled social media, internet pornography, COVID-19, or President Donald Trump. Hopefully, Judge will throw in a few more Texan Easter eggs as he sets off on a new adventure 1 dallasobserver.com | CONTENTS | UNFAIR PARK | SCHUTZE | FEATURE | NIGHT+DAY | CULTURE | MOVIES | DISH | MUSIC | CLASSIFIED | DALLAS OBSERVER MONTH XX–MONTH XX, 2014 JULY 7–13, 2022 DALLAS OBSERVER CLASSIFIED | MUSIC | DISH | CULTURE | UNFAIR PARK | CONTENTS dallasobserver.com
